What To Do When Kids Refuse To Regulate Emotions

Hey there,

Tell me if this sounds familiar: Your child is upset and getting quite dysregulated. You start offering some ideas for calming down, taking a break, and regrouping, but your child only gets more upset and louder. You try helping them calm down but they're refusing to accept that help. Before long, you're getting frustrated as well.

I hear ya'. Me too. How to handle this scenario is exactly what I tackle in this week's video:

These moments in family life are so hard. It's almost like we want peace more than our child does, and that can get tiring.

Yes, that's exactly where we find Jesus in our lives as well. He wants what's best for us at every moment of our lives, and yet so often we fail to follow through with what He's telling us would be best. We're not trying to disobey Jesus. We're not ignoring Him because we're mad at Him. There's just something else getting in the way - an issue we have with believing He really understands what we're struggling with or trusting His solution (which doesn't look like it will work) will actually work.

It's the same for our children. When they are getting upset and loud and we're trying to help them regulate their emotions and they refuse, it's not typically because they are trying to outright defy us. If they could do better, they likely would do better.

Instead, it's usually that in their current frustration and pain they want to make sure we understand them or they don't trust our our calming solutions are really what they need ... and they think this outburst is the best way to communicate that.

So what do we do when a child refuses to regulate their emotions or accept our help?

​Check out this week's video.

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You'll be so glad you did.

All my best,

B.J.